Chapter 7: Pussy

 Death’s Door

Chapter 7

Pussy

**

Panic had already started to set in before she slammed her bedroom door behind her. I hadn’t meant for her to be so upset. I’d meant for her to see through the joke after only a moment.

I went after her, barely setting foot in the hallway when she sobbed, “Don’t you dare! Go away! I can’t even look at you right now!”

Of course I wasn’t going to listen, but when I tried to open her door, she was leaning against it. “If you can’t look at me, then look at the cat.”

She sniffled and wailed, “Look at her? I can’t help but look at her! You’re horrible! I can’t… I can’t even…”

“Sookie, listen to me…”

She shrieked, “Fuck you! I don’t have to listen to you! Did you think this would be funny!?” Hilarious. I was wrong.

“Sookie, if you just let me explain…”

“Do you really think you could say anything to make this better!?”

“Yes.”

She swung the door open and leaned against the wall next to the door so that her raised eyebrow was the first thing I saw. “K. Let’s hear it then.” She wasn’t showing signs of being the slightest bit upset. She waited for a moment before she giggled, “Are we even or are we just going to keep going back and forth?”

“You were just pretending to be angry.” I had to wonder why she wouldn’t be angry about a naked cat though.

“Oh, I’d be plenty pissed if you’d actually shaved Tina. That would’ve been beautiful though. I’ll give you that.

“You knew?”

She set Armani down, smirking. “Look at me… smarter than the average blond.” And too proud of herself.

“How?”

“Does it matter? You didn’t get me. End of story.” Yes. Yes it fucking mattered. I shouldn’t be so out of practice. I couldn’t be rusty.

“Yes. It matters. Tell me.”

She shook her head while she giggled and took a step back.

I growled, “Soookie…

She took another step away from me, still too amused.

“When I first rose, you revealed that you’d made the impressively thoughtful gesture of meticulously light-proofing your house for me, but since then you’ve just been wicked.”

She inched away again and cackled, “OH! You soooo asked for that! And I want to point out that you called in reinforcements and you still failed… epic fail!” She punctuated my nose-rubbing by sticking her tongue out like an insolent child.

“How did you know?”

“Was that Versace or Armani? I can’t remember which one hates you.”

“Versace hates me. That’s Armani. You met them?

She wiggled her eyebrows. “Yeah… you know, when I was at Pam’s to grab clothes.” Fuck fuck fuck.

Worse… “Pam knew.”

“I guess she was staying out of it.” No… No, she was putting herself directly in the middle of ‘it’. She was sitting in her car laughing at my expense.

Without warning I grabbed Sookie, took her to the bed, and pinned her. “You’re a nasty little bitch when you want to be. I thought you hated me.”

She used her thumbs to push up the corners of my mouth. “Smile.”

“Why would I smile?”

“Because you had fun in spite of losing.” That was why it was so hard to keep my smile to myself.

I ran my fangs out. “I. Hate. Losing.”

“Then smile because…. you’re finally between my legs?

I chuckled in spite of trying to seem like a sore loser.

She smiled from ear to ear and rested her hands on my shoulders. “That’s better.”

“Fine. You won. How did you win?”

“You gave yourself away… and I cheated.”

“How did I give myself away?”

She chided playfully, “Well, first thing you have to do is remember that I can feel when you’re full of shit. When you locked down while we were still in the hall together, you weren’t pissed. You were trying to think of a way to pay me back.”

“How is it that you can distinguish that?”

“When you’re in a negative mood, your mind is dark and heavy, like when you woke up to me and Pam in your house… when you’re having fun, it’s much lighter. While we took our showers, you were having fun planning things.”

“Compare mine to Pam’s.”

She grinned. “No contest. Hers is much smaller. The other Sookie told me that it’s an age thing… Her mind is shades of gray… Yours ranges from bright white to pitch black. And yes, I could tell that she was in on it… which is why I eavesdropped on the first part of your conversation.”

“We spoke in Swedish though.”

She giggled, “Sweetie, vad tror du att du gjorde när du och Gran höll varandra sällskap?” Read, talk… wait. Fuck!

I groaned, “The cheating… I’d started teaching her how to speak Swedish?”

“I gave you a hint the other night… in the bathroom, I told you to…”

I finished, “GÅ BORT… I should’ve known.” Or at least asked where she’d heard it.

“I was running out of ways to get you to leave without having you yanked out of the house.”

“You learned Swedish from listening to your grandmother replay lessons in her head.” Brilliant.

“Well, for the two months she was learning, yeah. You must be a good teacher. She seemed to be picking it up pretty quick.”

“My accidental student seems to have learned enough. Is there anything else that I should know?”

“Nope… well, I almost kissed Pam after the way you barked at me to invite her in.”

“You might have tried.”

“I think I’m confused.” Judging by the coyness in her voice and grin, she was anything but confused.

Playing along, I asked, “What’s confusing you?”

“How is it that you think you have any claim over me when, at most, you flirt with me… Why shouldn’t I be able to kiss someone who’s sexy and available?”

“Because you’re Mine.”

“How am I Yours? How are you sure that you aren’t confusing your admittedly rarely experienced emotions? You’re probably just thinking there’s more to me because you aren’t used to having someone do a favor they aren’t already thinking of how to get repaid for.”

“I’m not going to deny that altruism is rare, but…”

“And maybe you’re just tempted because you can’t have me.”

“I can have you… I will.”

She sighed, “Eric, I get it. We’ve both seen that ‘We’ are possible… Hell, I’ll go as far as saying that ‘Eric and Sookie’ are good together, but the thing with the Queen is a problem. I don’t want to start something we can’t finish. You’re here now, but what happens next week? Next month? You can’t stay here forever.”

“Why not? I like it here.”

“Bon Temps or between my legs?”

“Both.”

She giggled, “Honestly. We can’t really be together. We can’t get away with it.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

She bit her lip again and shook her head.

“Then give me some time. I’ll think of something… I’m worried that you may still be discovered since your ability isn’t a secret to Weres.”

“Yeah… but… are you thinking that the skipping thing is why the Queen would be interested?”

“No. I’ll read the journal more thoroughly, but I’m sure we can hide the skips. The temptation I’m concerned about is your ability.”

“But I’m not the only telepath. She needs to just get her own.”

I nodded, smirking to goad her. “That’s right… because you already belong to someone.”

She narrowed her eyes. “I belong to me.”

For now… I have to ask. You’ve mentioned other telepaths. How do you know them?” She’d referred to them twice in passing as though I already knew about them.

“Already lining something up for when you outgrow me?”

“Stop that. I’m not going to get bored with you… Who are the other telepaths?”

She shrugged. “I dunno… They’re in Dallas, Baton Rouge, some little town called Isola in Missipp… The other Sookie mentioned them… She said it was all in the journal.”

“So you don’t know them personally? You aren’t related to them?”

She shook her head. “It’s kind of cool though. I always thought I was the only one…” Her eyes rolled up while she seemed to be trying to remember. “I think Sookie said that it was in September’s entries. Those two actually started going around looking for more people with abilities.”

“How did they do that?”

“Because one of the telepaths they found had a mom who killed herself after years of being treated for schizophrenia. You know, hearing voices. Since my mother was close to locking me up, they had the idea to start going to mental hospitals while they were traveling… They found a bunch of people that didn’t belong in a loony bin. Not just telepaths.”

“We should read the Blue pages soon then. What were the differences that you know of?”

“Blue Sookie was with that Vampire named Bill for a while. Rene noticed, of course, and killed Gran trying to get to her.”

“Rene killed Adele?”

That Rene did…”

“Same thing. There are certain constants that are unavoidable. It seems that Pam is always a brat, Adele is always an eager student of her surroundings, and you are always the most fascinating little thing I’ve ever come across. If A Rene killed Adele, then all of them would.” And it didn’t matter that he hadn’t laid a hand on her since Adele’s health deteriorated because her grandson was on trial for Rene’s crimes.

She shrugged again. “Ok. I’ll buy that, but what’s your point?”

“My point… is that while Coughlin is trying to connect 8 cases of murdered fangbangers, and Halloran is looking for legal loopholes…”

She gasped, covering her mouth. “The other Sookie said she used herself as bait! Eric…”

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to, but I think that I could do something for you…” Help her since supporting her proved to be tricky.

“You want to go out and get him to come after me? Like let him get into the house and then we can call the cops…” Or let him get into the house and then take his head from his shoulders.

I nodded because I didn’t want to encourage her decision.

She seemed to think about it for a few minutes before she finally shook her head. “No. No, we can’t… You could be recognized.”

“If that’s what you’re worried about, don’t. I’ll be recognized eventually. I can’t ‘have amnesia’ forever. I’m going to be forced to call the Queen in a couple of nights no matter how much I’m enjoying my ‘vacation’.”

“He’d be at Merlotte’s. Arlene would be working tonight since I quit and he waits for her. She doesn’t know he’s a killer, so she’s scared to work after dark.”

“I can fuck you on a table to get our point across…”

She cackled my correction, “I’ll get something for dinner since I was too busy to eat much today… Ok… we have plans… get off me…”

“Kiss me first.”

She shook her head. “Bite me first.”

“I’m not going to…”

She scoffed, “I’m not talking about a damn ‘candle lit dinner’. I just need some freakin’ fang marks to sell it and you’re not allowed to bite in public.”

“Then you’ll kiss me.”

She rolled her eyes teasingly. “Ok, fine, I’ll kiss you.”

“That wasn’t a question.”

She grinned as she lifted her head enough to gather her hair away from her neck. The little bit of squirming she did was encouraging in the worst possible way and I picked the wrong time to realize that Sookie hadn’t argued about the position we’d been in while we talked…

She tilted her chin up and to the side and all I could I do was watch her pulse move, mock me, make me forget that I’d just fed…

I had to force my fangs back so that I could numb her neck… easier said than done.

All she did was make it harder to behave.

It tickled, or so she said, so she giggled and squirmed and when I told her to be still, she accused me of tickling her intentionally.

I was tempted to demonstrate the difference… but not stupid enough.

I did myself the favor of biting her high… the yahoos at Merlotte’s wouldn’t know that the placement was off, and I didn’t need the encouragement from nicking her artery. The tease of her blood on my lips was hard enough to ignore.

I was sure that I’d never had blood that tasted so pure. So perfect…

Sweet and unbelievably rich… Just a few drops made me feel like I’d been starved… I was a walking chasm that needed to be filled with her.

Sookie didn’t make the slightest conscious noise until I’d been lost staring at her neck for a while.

She ran her fingers through my hair to get my attention. “Ok, now kiss me so we can get going.”

I shook my head. “No. Change of plans. I’m postponing our plans with Rene until tomorrow night.”

“Why?”

“Because tonight, we’ll stay here so I can fuck you and bite you until dawn.”

“As appealing as you make that sound, we should get going.” Stop the presses.

“The idea appeals to you?”

She growled and lifted her mouth to mine, fulfilling our verbal contract while I was too baffled by what she’d said to do anything about it. “All done. Let’s go.”

“That was hardly a kiss and…”

“That was hardly a bite. We’re even. Let’s go. Get off.”

“I’m not sure I can. You said that the idea of being fucked all night was tempting.”

“I said ‘appealing’…” She paused and huffed, “Roll us over at least.”

Since she wasn’t asking to break contact, I couldn’t argue. I held her hips and pulled her as I rolled to my back, still perfectly happy to be between her legs no matter what the position.

She stacked her fists on my chest and rested her chin on them. “I’m getting the feeling that you’re pretty possessive by nature. Am I right?”

“In certain circumstances, I’m very possessive.”

“So if we start sleeping together are you going to get more possessive?”

“Definitely.”

“Then your proposal is getting shot down because we need you to keep a level head. Not only do we need to cause a controlled ruckus at Merlotte’s, but if luck is on our side, we’re having a serial killer over later.”

“To clarify, the only reason that we’re not staying in to fuck our way through the house… is because you think I can’t remain objective.”

“No. I’m stalling because I have no idea of what to do with you…”

“If you don’t know how, it’s time to learn.”

She sat up quickly as she cackled, “I don’t think Gran was talking about sex!” I lifted, pushing her hips down and making her whimper.

“I’m sure she wasn’t speaking specifically about light proofing either, but it works for sex too.”

She was still smiling as she mumbled, “Maybe…” and laid over to reach under her pillow. She pulled out her Ziplocked peace offering and sat up again to show it to me. “But this’ll have to do for now.”

For the second time that night I’d been tempted enough by clothing that Pam would’ve had the chance to return a few jokes I’d made about her over the years.

Sookie crooned, “I know you want it… Vampire crack, right? It’s what Sookie called it in the journal.”

“You’re trying to distract me.”

“It’s working.” And?

“I still want to fuck you. The shirt isn’t going to remedy that.” If anything, wearing Sookie’s scent could make things worse.

She shrugged and cracked the seal on the bag to sniff it. “I don’t get it. Maybe I didn’t do it right… It doesn’t smell like anything to me.”

She wasn’t done speaking before the smell of sunlight reached me. It hadn’t taken but a tiny break in the seal for the scent to be strong enough to draw my attention. “Because you’re used to it… In the spring honeysuckle begins to bloom and the air is rich with its fragrance, yes?”

She grinned as she nodded. “It’s starting to come back already. I ate breakfast on the porch to enjoy it this morning.”

“It doesn’t stop blooming until well into the fall, but you stop noticing it after a couple of months.”

“Good point. I never thought about it.”

“Yet after only a few months, you enjoy the scent enough that you basked in it this morning… I haven’t smelled sunshine in over a thousand years.”

“Why not hang your clothes out on the line to dry?” I couldn’t take my eyes from the bag.

“Because it makes clothing smell like baked grass. There’s something about your chemistry that makes you smell sweet in spite of your surroundings and when you’ve been in the sun, its scent transfers…”

“I think I’m gonna cry again.”

“Don’t cry, just start wearing my shirts during the day.”

She sniffled, but she was smiling when she leaned over to kiss me again. “Glad you like it. Change your shirt while I go introduce Tina to Armani.”

I wrapped my arms around her before she could sit up. “Thank you.” I’d never meant it more, but it didn’t seem like enough.

I didn’t have it left in me to behave. She was trying to say, “You’re welcome,” when I kissed her. I almost wished that she hadn’t cooperated…

The heat from her lips, the way her breath fell over my skin, how her tongue felt against mine…

I could’ve sworn that I tasted the disappointment in her whimper when she backed away.

She was already in the kitchen before I could think about anything but what she’d done to me.

No one had ever affected me the way she had, but if it weren’t for the journal I’d have wasted time like ‘August Eric’ had… he thought he could resist. Having seen the video made me want to laugh at him… she’d sat on his lap for the recording and his arms had gone around her as automatically as mine had gone around My Sookie… yes, already. Mine. There wasn’t any question. There wasn’t a shred of doubt… Several Mes couldn’t be wrong about the same little slice of sunlight.

Finally taking the shirt out of the bag sealed her fate.

Sookie was going to be Mine if I had to end the Queen myself to secure Sookie’s safety.

**

Of course, the first thing to be seen when we walked into Sookie’s repugnant former place of employment was the Shifter.

As though his face wasn’t sour enough, he might as well have shit in his pants to add to the excuse for his expression.

He stepped out from behind the bar aggressively enough that a skinny red-headed server looked frightened, but Sookie was unmoved.

Sookie shook her head and mumbled, knowing the cantankerous mutt would hear her perfectly. “Don’t you dare cause a scene, Sam. I need 2 minutes. Your office. Now.”

She elbowed me when I chuckled that he ‘obeyed’ when she pointed towards the back hallway.

The Shifter was less impressed than ever that I was in company when Sookie closed the door to his office behind us. He shouted, “So not only do you quit by sending a damn candy-gram, but you bring him to…”

Sookie grabbed a bottle of rum from the shelf next to the door and waved it through the air to stop his tirade. “Stop being a bitch, right now. Hear me out.”

He growled, “Do you really think I want to hear what you have to say?”

“Why wouldn’t you? Ohhh… yeah… because I’m dumber for not dating you.”

“No. You’re dumber for letting him bite you!”

She shrugged. “I didn’t let him bite me. I asked him to. I couldn’t help myself. He’d been playing with my pusss…”

I put my hand over her mouth. “If you want me to behave, that needs to stop.”

She groaned into my hand and rolled her eyes, finally mumbling, “Fine…” I moved my hand, sure that it hurt her to not continue taunting the Shifter. “Look, Sam… If Rene wasn’t here, we’d have just gone home. I’m using my final check as an excuse to be here with my Vampire friend…”

He snarled, “The one that played with your pussy until you asked him to bite you?”

“That’s the one. I told you about Rene ages ago… So here’s what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna take a few minutes to tally up my hours and write my last check. I’m gonna go out and grab a burger while we wait…”

“I’m outta True Bloods, but he already ate, huh?”

“Focus on something other than me sleeping with him, for God sakes… Feel free to flip your shit when you bring my check to me. The more attention that gets brought to the fact that I’m a fangbanger, the better. I’m hoping Rene comes after me.”

He shook his head like he had peanut butter stuck to the roof of his mouth. “You what!?

“I’ve got a fresh set of fang marks and hell or high water, Jason’s coming home, dammit.”

“I guess you’ve got protection tonight, but what happens if Rene comes after you during the day, genius?”

“Why would he wait, Sam? You’re gonna flip your lid in front of the whole bar… Your hissy fit is gonna make it perfect. He rapes and strangles me like he’s done to the other girls and everyone is still talking about how pissed you are about me being with a Vampire… who cares if Jason looks innocent because now Sam looks guilty, especially since Dawn worked for you too and you’re the only man in the parish she didn’t screw. If he waits, you’ll have an alibi because daytime means you’re here working. Either way he’ll think that when my body is found, you’ll get blamed.” There had never been a better patsy born.

“And what’s Jan gonna be doing while Rene is lurking around your property?”

“I dunno. We’ll just wait and light a fire, maybe watch some por…” My hand went over her mouth again and she giggled into it as I carried her out of Merlotte’s office.

**

I kicked the bathroom door shut behind us and started laughing right away. “I’ll say it again. You are a nasty little bitch when you want to be.” I’d never been more excited by those qualities either.

She looked like a perfect angel when she gasped, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You told him I was playing with your pussy?”

She giggled, “I should’ve told him you ‘shaved’ it for me too… Why didn’t I mention that you make it so happy that it vibrates?”

I chuckled, “I don’t know. You forgot to mention that you were wailing at the top of your lungs.”

“And the strip tease in the kitchen.”

“A nastier bitch might’ve mentioned that I’ve been ‘playing with your pussy’ for months now.”

“Or the video ‘We’ made… You’re not the only one who can double-talk.”

“Obviously.”

She giggled, “You think you can wipe that grin off your face yet?”

“Maybe. How long will it be gone before you start talking about your pussy again?”

Her eyes sparkled devilishly. “I dunno, but I could go for days after listening to the guys in the shop with their innuendo and… God, the animal references. Bernie calls his wife ‘Kitty’.”

“Am I assuming correctly that her name isn’t Katherine and she doesn’t shift into any sort of cat?”

“There’s nothing feline about her… Hannah’s a Human. Pervert calls the texting he does, ‘feeding the kitty’.”

“Because if he doesn’t pacify Kitty, Kitty won’t play with him.”

She rolled her eyes and grabbed my hand to start tugging me to the door. “I swear… you might be just as bad.” Worse. I had more practice.

**

Sookie made it a point to take a seat in Arlene’s section. Even if Merlotte ignored the invitation to be an asshole, Arlene would say something to Rene once they were home.

Without invitation, the skinny redhead slid into the booth to sit across from us instead of take Sookie’s order.

What the hell, Sookie? Sam says you quit.” Her accent was so thick, she was almost a parody of Southerners.

Sookie didn’t bother straightening her posture and continued leaning against me when she shrugged. “I have another job and Sam’s still being a jerk about us not riding off into the sunset together. It came to a head the other night when he stopped by. Apparently, if I’m not dating him, I shouldn’t be dating anyone. He had himself a little tantrum when he saw me with Jan… Jan, this is Arlene Lanier. Arlene, Jan VanLuik.”

She smiled reflexively and put her hand out to shake mine. Not that I was in the practice, but I shook it so that she wouldn’t be left guessing. “Nice to… nice… to… meet yoooooo…” As soon as my cold hand met the warmth of hers, her eyes went directly to Sookie’s marking and by the time she looked back to me, there were fangs in my grin. “Sookie!?

Sookie grinned. “Yeah?”

“You’re with a Vampire?”

“For a while now. Sam’s being a jerk about Jan having fangs instead of admitting to himself that he’s just hung up on me. He’s being a right-ass about it.”

“Well… no offense… but… he’s probably worried about ya. I mean… Vampire’s eat people!”

I shook my head. “Actually, we drain them. There’s rarely chewing involved…” She was already pale, but what little bit of color she had disappeared instantly. “Most of us can control ourselves. For instance, I could feed from Sookie indefinitely and she’d never feel any ill effects. I could take enough from you to sustain myself for a week and you’d never know.”

“You… you… you…”

I ran my finger along the back of her hand and pulled her attention to calm her nerves. The woman was so simple that glamouring her took no effort. “Are you available later, Arlene?”

“Nnnnnnnno… I… I have kids to get home to…”

“Pity. Another time then?”

Sookie snickered as Arlene nodded slowly.  “Yeah… sure…”

“In the meantime, would you do a favor for me?”

She breathed, “Anything,” while a stocky little man at the bar scowled in my direction.

“Take Sookie’s order. She hasn’t eaten enough today.”

Her eyes were locked on mine. “What can I get for ya, Sook?”

Sookie giggled, “A burger Lafayette and a sweet tea, thanks.”

I took my finger away from her hand and motioned to the kitchen. “Now be a good girl and run along to give the order to the kitchen. Kiss your husband on your way.”

She nodded absently. “What kind of kiss?”

“The kind you don’t give him in front of your children.”

Sookie and I watched her slide out of the booth and go directly to the man leering from the bar, answering my question as to if he was Rene, and she proceeded to straddle his lap…

Sookie hid her face against my shoulder to quietly call her friend a, “Face-rapist.”

“It could be the last kiss she gives him. She might as well enjoy it.”

“I’m going to ignore that you hide being nice under causing trouble and mention that glamouring is the coolest freaking thing ever.”

“What’s so ‘cool’ about it?”

“It’s abstract so it’s hard to describe… Humans have this dense piece of meat between their ears. Vampires have… you know the fog caused by dry ice?”

“I do.”

“It’s like that… and when you glamoured her just then, I felt your mind kinda seep into hers, like her mind was an extension of yours.”

“That certainly makes it seem more interesting… Now take off your shirt.”

She giggled and elbowed my ribs. “You aren’t even trying.”

“I know better than to try glamouring you, but I still want you to take off your shirt.”

She raised her eyebrow. “I’ll take mine off right now…”

“Thank you. How very accommodating.”

“If you take yours off.” No.

“Thanks anyway.”

She laughed and leaned over to smell my neck. “I like the way you smell too. Maybe I should get you to start wearing my shirts.” The mental image of wearing her tiny tank tops wasn’t nearly as appealing to me as the idea of her wearing my shirts.

“You’ll always smell like me once we bond and your shirts wouldn’t be stretched.”

“If I’ll smell like you then how would you still enjoy pre-worn shirts?”

“You’ll smell like I was with you even if it’d been weeks since we’d been in contact. You’ll smell like both of us.”

“Will you smell like me?”

“No. That’s why you’ll need to mark my shirts.” Every. Fucking. Day.

“So Supes will know I’m yours right away?”

“Yes.”

“But there’s no way for me to mark my territory.” She spent too much time with wolves.

“Would you like to mark me?”

“That’s not what I meant. It’s just a little one sided.”

“Smelling like you is a euphoric perk to being with you. Your bonus to smelling like me is that most Supes will know that touching you would be the end of them.” Humans weren’t fortunate enough to get that warning.

“Saying I belong to you isn’t enough?”

“Not always, but I’d still like to hear you say it.”

She licked her lips as she moved closer to whisper into my ear, “I’m sure you would.”

When she pulled back, I held her still to return her whisper. “Don’t tease.”

“Would you really kill someone just for touching me?”

“Yes… Once we’re bonded there’s no excuse for any Vampire to touch you again.”

“But right now, anyone could do whatever they wanted to me?”

“Not if they want to live. I’d still kill them, but I’d have to answer for it.”

“We’re not talking about friendly hugs or anything though, right?”

“Among Humans and some Weres, no, but Vampires aren’t permitted to touch another Vampire’s property unless they’re given permission.”

“When would you say that’s it’s alright?”

“Give me an example.”

“Like if I got to be friends with Pam.”

“That would be allowed providing you aren’t suggesting that I share you with her like you did earlier…”

She was already giggling another apology for her ruse into my ear when we were interrupted.

**

Merlotte slammed a brown paper bag down in front of Sookie and leaned onto the table. He was glaring at her for a moment before she barely breathed out, “Close enough to leave evidence.” It was as though she was answering an unasked question.

He growled before he yelled, “None of that shit here! If you want to make out with your Vampire boy-toy, go do that shit in the cemetery!”

She shook her head and spat, “Sam Merlotte you’re being a bigot! We aren’t hurting anything by being here!”

“There’s laws against him feeding in public… so you can just start eating at home too! Go’on! Get your dumb ass outta here!”

“Dumb ass? DUMB ASS! Are you kidding me? I’m a dumbass for being with a Vampire, but you’re allowed to go running around with what-freaking-ever blows through town? You’re not now, and you haven’t ever been, in a position to dictate who I go to bed with.” I almost laughed when she rubbed his nose in his infatuation with the Maenad.

“Yes, you’re a dumbass… Dawn and Lafayette are dead and they weren’t even looking for trouble…” He grabbed her wrist and even though he seemed to be helping Sookie’s plans of a ‘controlled ruckus’, my fangs ran out. As he pulled her out of the booth, I followed, grabbing his wrist to make him release hers. He had to know I wasn’t going to let him get away with touching her, even if he was acting.

Whether he was cooperating or not, I didn’t want to have too much fun with Merlotte. Putting him on the floor and toying with his masculinity would’ve been highly amusing, but I wanted a serial killer to take some bait, not encourage a town to light torches. Not when I wanted to stay there.

Sookie pulled my waist, repeating that he wasn’t ‘worth it’ as I inched closer. “Keep your hands off of things that don’t belong to you.”

“She doesn’t belong to you, jerk off! She’s a Human and slavery hasn’t been legal for a long time!”

“Awww. What’s wrong? Is your feelings hurt that Sookie lets a monster like me between her legs and you get left in the yard?”

He growled, “She doesn’t know who you really are. If she did, she wouldn’t have anything to do with you.”

“She understands who I am better than anyone… It’s your intelligence I question since you don’t seem to be smart enough to know when to start chasing another female.”

“She’s not yours!”

I’d barely decided to tell him that she was more mine than his since I’d had Sookie’s pussy on my lap (it was only fair that I get to enjoy the joke too), when Sookie barked, “YES. I. AM!” Oh really?

He shouted past me, “Sookie, you’re being stupid! He’s pretty and all, but he’s about as far from an angel as you can get!”

Sookie snorted as she snatched the bag from the table. “That’s funny since he checked in with the Sheriff earlier and she couldn’t have been happier to see him.” That was almost as good of a lie as playing with Sookie’s pussy had been. Pam had been beside herself over her new ensemble.

“The Sheriff is ERIC NORTHMAN! Not a woman!”

“Shows how much you know. Why don’t you call Sheriff Ravenscroft and do a background check on him. Jan VanLuik hasn’t ever caused any trouble at all.” Cute.

“Why would I trust another Vampire? She’d just tell me that ‘Jan’ here is a saint.”

“No. She’d tell you that he’s strong enough that you shouldn’t test his patience…” She started walking by him and punched his stomach hard enough to double him over. “She couldn’t possibly warn you about how much I’ll put up with though.”

**

When I opened the car door for her she stopped. Her hand rested on my arm and I watched chills spread over her skin while her eyes were closed. “What are you doing?”

She breathed, “shhhh, listening.”

To fill the idle time in the parking lot that didn’t smell any better than the inside of the ‘Bar & Grill’, I did the same. What I lacked in telepathy, I excelled in acute senses… While Arlene defended me to a local by saying that I was ‘sweet’ when we’d met, the rest of the murmurings in the dining room were just as surprising.

More than half of the customers were complaining about the scene, blaming Sam’s jealousy instead of focusing on the Vampire that he’d held responsible.

There was a woman who said Sookie might’ve been crazy, but it wasn’t any of Sam’s business to judge her after what she’d been through. Apparently, Sookie deserved to have a personal life since she’d lost everything else.

A man with a gravelly voice actually spoke directly to Sam to tell him that he was lucky I didn’t pull him apart and put him on the menu after the way he behaved. Sam’s only defense was telling ‘Terry’ to mind his own business. Terry’s voice became deeper, more menacing. “Fine Sam, but he didn’t give two shits that you insulted him. What lit a fire under his ass was when you grabbed Sook. Hell, even I wanted to hit you for that shit.”

Sam growled at him while several patrons agreed with Terry…

Vampires, 1. Shifters, 0.

I could’ve counted the other night at Sookie’s house against him, but I was feeling charitable enough to call that encounter a scrimmage.

Sookie finally broke her concentration by shuddering. “It worked.”

“Rene?”

“He’s planning to take Arlene home and leaving once she’s asleep… He’s conflicted about killing another one of her friends, but he hates that Arlene isn’t scared of you.”

“Then we should go home and make our plan.”

She giggled as she climbed to her seat. “You just called my house ‘home’.”

**

It might’ve been a remnant of feeling safe there while I had amnesia, but ‘home’ is what I thought about while I drove to the Compton estate…

I hid my car behind that house so that Rene would assume Sookie was unprotected and scooped Sookie up to fly over the cemetery instead of let her stumble through it. She hadn’t expected to fly, but since I lifted us slowly, she had the chance to brace herself instead of panic. She looked around, taking in her surroundings wearing a radiant smile to go with the exhilaration that I could’ve sworn I felt without the benefit of a bond.

As I set her feet on the porch, she sighed contentedly, “It’s a shame we’ve got stuff to do. I could’ve done that all night.”

“Just let me know. I’ll clear my schedule.”

She smiled and kissed my cheek, but her phone began ringing before anything else could be said or done.

She fumbled for her keys and raced to the kitchen. “Hey Tray, what’s up?”

“How did you know it was me?”

“Deacon was pulling into Merlotte’s as we were leaving. I figured he heard the gossip and called you from the bathroom.” Tray and I both chuckled at her logic.

Tray was still amused when he corrected, “He went back to his truck… So Merlotte picked a fight with y’all?”

“Sort of… Tray, we did it so that Rene would come after me…”

OH. NO. YOU. DON’T! You promised to give me a week before you gave me another batch of grays!”

“But I’m not saving the world… I’m just trying to get my brother out of prison.”

“What are you going to do? Wait in bed and then ‘defend yourself’?”

“I’m going to wait in bed and then I’ll be protected.”

“Is ‘Pam’ going to rescue you?”

“Yes sir. No worries. Even if Rene was a Were, he’s no match for a Vampire.”

“And even if that new lawyer can’t get Jason’s case reopened, having Rene in custody for DNA evidence and fingerprinting after he pulled the same MO… it’ll be one hell of a… DAMN IT GIRL! I fucking hate that it makes sense!”

“I’m sorry.”

“Bull. Shit. I’ll be over in half an hour…”

“No. Don’t. The SUV is over behind the old Compton place so that Rene thinks I’m alone. We’ve got to settle in for the night so that he doesn’t get spooked off…”

“Which is why I’m going to leave my truck there too and wait in the woods. If something goes wrong, ‘Pam’ needs to see to you and I can take Rene down.”

“Yes sir. Love you…” She rolled her eyes and whispered to me, “There’s no point in arguing with him. He’s just as stubborn as you are.”

Tray grumbled, “Love you too, and I heard that… you obstinate little…” He hung up before he could finish complaining about her.

**

After eating her dinner and once the cats were locked in the bathroom in Adele’s old room, Sookie changed into a nightgown and slid into bed.

Not that I’d have left her alone, but her anxiety was obvious enough that once I turned the lights off, I joined her.

She pulled my arm over her side and pushed over to put her back against me.

She was quiet for a while before her breathing slowed down and her body seemed to relax.

Only a few minutes later, I heard Tray’s truck rumble along the driveway to the Compton house, but if he was in the woods, he wasn’t making any noise.

It was nearly 1am when our ‘company’ finally arrived. Even as she slept, Sookie tensed.

She mumbled sleepily, “You know… you know you have to let him get to me, right?”

“He won’t touch you.”

“If he’s going to look guilty then he has to at least touch me… mark me somehow.”

“No.”

“Eric, you know I’m right and this is the wrong time to argue with me about it. He needs to leave evidence. He needs to hurt me.”

“I’m not going to stand by and let you get hurt…”

“You can’t just grab him. Think about it… If you just catch him in the house, it’s just breaking and entering. That’s not going to help Jason.”

“As much as you care about your brother, I’m thinking about your wellbeing. I won’t let you get injured when there’s a chance the lawyer and detective…”

“If I uninvite you, I’m on my own.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“Eric, I’m not suggesting that you let him get as far as raping me… he strangles his victims first.”

“You want me to watch him strangle you?” That wasn’t going to happen.

“I want you to give me the chance to try to fight him off… I need to scratch him or pull his hair… I’ll owe you one.”

“No, but you will let me heal you as soon as the authorities are gone.”

She rolled over to face me… she was scared and trying to be braver than the situation called for. “Whatever needs to be done.”

“You won’t fight me.”

She shook her head slowly. “No. I won’t fight you. Thank you.” She leaned enough to give me a nervous kiss. She was terrified, but she wasn’t going to say so. “Go on… He’s creeping around the back of the house looking in windows. You need to get out of sight.”

“How do you know it isn’t Tray?”

“Among other things, I listened to Tray shift… Go on. Out of sight. Be cliché.”

“Cliché?”

She tried to smile. “Yep. I’m asking a Vampire to lurk in the shadows and wait to get the jump on an unsuspecting Human.”

I managed to muster a grin as I left the bed to wait behind her bedroom door.

**

It felt like years.

Sookie whispered quietly to let me know Rene was looking through the bedroom windows… and that Tray was watching him move through the yard…

I let her know when I heard the latch on the back porch’s door break, but I hadn’t needed to say anything when he pushed the interior door open. The frame splintered away from the bolt that he hadn’t tried to turn.

One step at a time, Rene’s boot falls echoed through the house. He slowed down as he walked through the living room and stopped at the door to Adele’s room to go in and pace slowly.

When he stopped at the doorway to Sookie’s room, I didn’t think he was ever going to leave it. I was forced to stand witness, listening to his heart race and smelling his excitement… while Sookie was forced to listen to whatever depraved thoughts he was having.

He fantasized and planned for the longest ten minutes of my life.

When he finally moved, he stepped carefully in small strides… inching closer and closer to Sookie as she played opossum…

He crept close enough to lean over and whisper into her ear, “I’m doing this for your own good…”

And as soon as she opened her eyes, he moved quickly to wrap a cord around her neck and climb on top of her…

1… 2… I promised… 3… she wanted there to be evidence of an attack… 4… she struggled and slapped his hands… 5… the longer it went on, the more excited he became… 6… no…

I wasn’t waiting…

I grabbed him from behind and threw him from the bed, taking the cord from her neck and waiting for her to show me that she was alright. There was definitely going to be a mark left behind.

I waited another eternity while Sookie sobbed and took panicked gasps for air and finally croaked that she’d be fine.

I nodded and turned my attention to the grunting lump of shit on the other side of her room.

I lifted him by his hair, holding him from behind and waiting for him to be done pissing all over himself before I said anything. “You killed a friend of mine.”

He fought to free himself. “Go ahead. Kill me.”

I moved my hands to his throat and gave it a little squeeze. “I’m not going to kill you. That would be too fast.

He gasped, “If you…”

He was distracted when I started running my thumb along the back of his neck… counting. “If I, what?”

“If you turn me…”

“You cause enough trouble as a Human…”

Pam’s medical infatuation had been helpful over the years. One of the many things I’d learned by proxy had been that the Human body was a fragile structure… The spine in particular…

The trick, the art of keeping a Human imprisoned in its own body without a way to control it was in where the pressure was put. Yes, the devil was in the details.

Breaking the neck too high meant that one might as well have chosen the less controlled of the options. It left the human twitching on the floor until its functions stopped receiving messages from its brain.

Breaking the neck too low meant that the Human could retain the full use of its arms.

Anatomically, the jaw lined up with ‘C3’…

The C4 vertebra was just below it and was a sensitive area since breaking that one could mean paralyzing the diaphragm…

C5. C5 and C6 to be more specific. Even if the Human can hold onto some muscle control in its upper limbs, it would most likely need to be hand fed for the rest of its life.

**

As soon as Rene crumpled to the floor, Sookie bolted from the bed and leapt up to hold me with her arms and legs.

She was trembling and weeping uncontrollably and I wished I’d given her some blood beforehand… Not only would it have bolstered her strength for the struggle she ‘needed’, but I’d have a hint about her mood… I couldn’t tell if she was still frightened or grateful that the ordeal was over.

I was practically wearing her as I walked to the living room to use the house phone. Sookie was hyperventilating, but the phone call needed to be made. Evidence needed to be collected.

“Raynard 9-1-1. What’s your emergency?”

“I’ve just injured an intruder. I’m at 200 Hummingbird Lane. Bon Temps.”

“Yes sir. How is he injured?”

“I broke his neck when I found him trying to strangle my girlfriend.” I almost laughed at myself for calling Sookie my girlfriend.

“You broke his neck? Is he alive?”

“Unfortunately.”

“Ummmm…. Is your girlfriend injured? You? Is that her I hear crying?”

“She has bruising on her neck. I’m fine. And yes, she’s the one upset.”

There was a brief pause while she typed the relevant information. “Emergency services have been dispatched, sir. Can I have your name?”

“Jan VanLuik. We’re at Sookie Stackhouse’s home.”

“Sookie Stackhouse being your girlfriend?”

“Yes. I’m going to wait for the police.”

“Sir, I’d like to keep you on the line in the case that there is more trouble…”

I hung up, not caring about the script dispatchers were given. It wasn’t as though Lanier was capable of being a nuisance anymore.

**

I only had to step out to the porch before Tray approached the house. He was too anxious for news to go back for his clothing and shifted along the way… It only reminded me of why it had been so easy for me to believe Sookie’s joke. Weres had less modesty than I did.

Tray was beside himself over how upset Sookie was. She still hadn’t spoken or let go of me, but he wasn’t angry at anyone in particular… If anything he was pissed that he hadn’t gotten to be more help, but he laughingly mentioned that he hadn’t expected to be.

I gave him my keys so that he could bring my SUV back to the house before the police arrived. When he came back, he took the spare key that was taped to the underside of the porch swing and put it on my ring.  Since he came back clothed, he went inside to inspect the scene and came out again laughing about paralysis being ‘better than Depo’. As soon as he heard sirens, he ran off to get into his truck, congratulating us and promising to look in on Sookie during the day.

The ambulance workers arrived first. They ran towards the house as though there was something pressing waiting for them. I pointed towards the front door. “Last door on the right. No rush. He isn’t going anywhere.”

They balked. I assumed that I’d been expected to be more bothered by having broken a man’s neck. They didn’t seem able to move until the arrival of a squad car interrupted the gaping they were doing.

Andy Bellefleur.  Retard Laureate of the Bon Temps Sheriff’s Department. He slammed his car door shut and blustered towards where I was sitting on the porch steps with Sookie. He wasn’t drunk, but he’d been drinking.

“What the holy hell happened, Sookie!?”

She whimpered and tightened her grip, leaving me to answer. “I left for an errand after I took her out for dinner. I came home to find her being attacked.”

“And who the fuck are you?”

“Jan VanLuik. If you have any complaints or suspect my behavior, I answer to Pamela Ravenscroft, Sheriff of Area 5.”

“Area ffffff…. You’re a Vampire!?

I nodded and half expected for him to ask to see my fangs.

“How long y’all been together?”

“Could we focus on the fact that Sookie was choked and had I not interfered when I did, Rene Lanier would’ve done to Sookie what he did to the other ‘fangbangers’ you imprisoned Jason for killing?”

“That wasn’t my fault!” Yes it was. His moronic beliefs in Jason Stackhouse’s guilt was another ‘constant’ and had been outlined in the journal entries we’d read.

I wasn’t going to argue with him. “Sookie had been busy during the day and hadn’t had the opportunity to eat. We left for Merlotte’s at 9:15 arriving only a few moments later. While we were there, Sam Merlotte caused a scene about Sookie being with me. No doubt, Merlotte’s reaction to Sookie being a ‘fangbanger’ is what brought Lanier to the conclusion that she should die. When we left, we returned to the house. She took the time to eat since she’d gotten her order ‘to go’ while I made some phone calls and I left for an errand in Shreveport shortly thereafter.”

“What kind of errand?”

“I went to the Chevrolet dealership to choose a car for Sookie.”

“This late?”

“I don’t have to deal with salesmen if I go after hours.”

“How are you going to get it then?”

“Sookie’s employer, Tray Dawson, offered to deliver it for me.”

“What did you pick?” As dim as he was, he was trying to catch me in a lie.

“Corvettes. Z06… A blue one for Sookie and a red one for me.” Her lack of reaction did nothing but make me more worried about her.

His mouth falling open actually made him look smarter. “Uhhhhh…. Mmm… What did you see when you walked in?”

“When I returned, I entered through the front door and nothing seemed out of place. He’d gotten in by pushing in the door to the mud-porch. I heard him say that he was doing ‘this’ for her own good… When I reached the bedroom, Lanier was straddling her chest. He had a length of cord wrapped around her neck. She was still fighting but he had the cord tight enough that she couldn’t call for help.”

“And what did you do?”

“I threw him across the room. I took the cord from Sookie’s neck and waited for her to say something, which she barely managed. When he tried to get to his feet, I grabbed him and broke his neck so that he couldn’t escape.”

“You broke his neck?”

“He’s still alive, but even if you’re so worthless that you can’t convict him when he was caught in the act, he won’t be murdering anymore fangbangers.”

“Those murders stopped when we took Jason Stackhouse into custody…”

“Because Rene Lanier stopped killing in Raynard Parish, you obtuse oaf. There have been more victims that you should contact Detective Coughlin in Shreveport about.”

“There’s more?”

“Three before the Bon Temps victims and three since he’s been in jail. Jason Stackhouse must be diabolical if he can kill from prison. Even more impressive is that he figured out the perfect way to murder his own sister who’d been working two jobs to keep his house for him.”

“Has Sookie said anything to you?”

“No. As soon as Lanier was unconscious, she glommed onto me.”

He stammered, “That’s… That’s… She should go to the hospital… That’s not like her.”

I shook my head. “Granted, she’s in shock, but since you know about her unique ability… you know, the one you blatantly ignored when you helped convict an innocent man of rape and murder… considering her talent, do you think her condition would improve when she’s surrounded by the pain and suffering of others?”

“Uh… no?”

So began the backpedaling.

While Rene was taken to a hospital and Sookie’s bedroom was taken apart for evidence Sookie remained quietly attached to me… But Bellefleur was an apologetic little apple polisher until 4:30 when he finally left after Sookie’s finger nails had been scraped and photos of her neck were taken for substantiation.

**

Once we were finally alone again, I carried her to the bathroom. I tried putting her in the tub, but her legs weren’t cooperating…

It took me a few minutes to remember something from the journal… that ‘August Sookie’ hid from misery using her Eric’s mind… the journal mentioned that she’d done it to avoid the stress of airplane landings and to ignore the pain of waiting for news of Adele’s heart attack in the hospital.

I set her on the counter and pried her hands away from my neck, backing away slowly and waiting for her eyes to meet mine.

“Enjoy your vacation?”

She whimpered and her eyes started to well again. “You killed him.”

I shook my head. “No, but if you start crying again, I might need to.”

“What did you do?”

“His neck is broken. What do you remember?”

“Watching him hit the floor… Then I grabbed you… Did you call 9-1-1 already?” It was amazing to me that she circumvented the chaos by seeking solace in my mind… further proof that she couldn’t hear my thoughts on a regular basis since Lanier hadn’t exactly inspired me to think of rainbows and daisies.

“I called them. Tray’s already gone and Detective Bellefleur is most likely kicking his own ass. They’ve all left. Rene was taken to the hospital in Minden.”

“Don’t I… I didn’t… I need to give a statement…”

“Eventually. Bellefleur believed that you were in shock because it wasn’t like you to be quiet for so long. He said that my statement and the evidence was enough for the time being.”

“Oh God… what name did you give?”

“Jan VanLuik… I sent Pam a text to have her corroborate my existence and I arranged for my alias last night. I’ll be getting my new documentation soon enough. If Bellefleur asks for it, I can stall for a while.”

“Did he believe it or did he give you a hard time?”

“You missed it while you were hiding. He kissed my ass.”

She forced a halfhearted grin. “Liar.”

“He believed it. He tried to apologize to you and promised to ‘fix it’.”

She covered her mouth and gasped, “It’s over?”

I nodded. “Hopefully. You should call Coughlin and Halloran later to make sure they know that Rene Lanier made an attempt on your life.”

“What did you tell Andy?”

I lifted her and put her in the tub without the resistance I’d had before. “Everything… My only deviation is that I left the house to run an errand and I returned in time to hear Lanier say that he was doing it for your own good…. Now bathe. I need to shower too. I don’t want Lanier to be the first thing I smell when I rise tonight.”

She nodded and closed the shower curtain. Her nightgown was tossed over the bar just a moment before the water was turned on.

While she rinsed away the scent of her would-be murderer, I went to the kitchen to block the broken door with a hutch so that it wouldn’t be unsecure while we were resting, and released the cats from Adele’s bathroom.

By the time Sookie was done, I was waiting for her with a fresh towel… eager to be rid of Lanier’s filth.

**

There was something awkward about Sookie when I left the bathroom.

She’d opened the windows in her bedroom and closed the door to let it air out.

She puttered about in the kitchen, getting a drink for herself and refilling the cat’s dishes.

When she started washing the coffee pot, apparently out of nervous energy, I wrapped my arms around her from behind only to have her tense.

“You should rest.”

“I don’t know if I can… I… I can’t stop thinking about…”

“I have to go soon. I don’t want you to spend the day scared.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know if I could…”

I turned the facet off and she turned it on again. So stubborn.

I turned the water off, scooping her up before she could resist anymore, and took her upstairs.

Sookie seemed puzzled more than anything when I put her on the bed in my room and laid behind her. “We still have business to tend to and there isn’t much time left before dawn.”

She sighed, “What business?”

“First, you won’t do that to me again. I only agreed because of the love you have for your brother, but I won’t let you be bait again. I regret making the suggestion.”

She sniffled, “I think I learned my lesson… I’ve never been so scared… I promise.”

“I wasn’t asking.”

“I wasn’t arguing… I saw them.”

“Who?”

“The other girls… when he was choking me… I saw what they all looked like while he was killing them… I… Every time I close my eyes…” She stopped as two tears fell from her cheek and trickled over my arm.

“I waited longer than I wanted to. I wasn’t going to let him kill you too… And we know there won’t be more.”

She nodded slowly. “Second?”

I ran my fingers over the ridges of swelling caused by the cords. “Does it hurt?”

“Yeah… it’s sore.”

“I told you that I was going to heal you.”

She took a deep breath. “I kind of think I should deal with it. I’m the idiot…”

Before she could finish suggesting that she bear the bruises of being strangled, I bit into my wrist and put it to her mouth. “No. You won’t suffer when I can help it. You’ve suffered enough because of Lanier.”

She jerked her head back, nearly breaking my nose in the process. She gasped and rolled over to grab my face. “Oh God! I’m sorry… I wasn’t… Are you alright? I just wasn’t expecting it.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’m fine. You’re the one that needs attention.”

The wound in my wrist was already closing by the time I held it up to her again. “Will we be bonded?”

“No. I’ll be able to feel you, but it takes more than one exchange to bond.”

“But you’ve already fed from me once.”

“Feeding from a Human doesn’t affect a bond. That’s part of survival. A Human has to feed from a Vampire to start that process… Are you done stalling?”

She whimpered, “Ummm… I guess.”

Sookie cringed before she settled back onto the bed like she’d been before with her back to me and I lifted my arm again. “Are you ready now?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re certain?”

“Uh huh.”

“You’re positive?”

She scoffed and swatted my leg. “Now you’re making fun of me.”

“I’m just making sure. If I’m going to be bitten repeatedly, I’d rather you were the one doing it.”

“Hey, Mr. Millennium, I’m allowed to be uptight about something I’ve never done before. I can’t even start to describe the look on your face when you realized we were cuddling last night.”

She’d definitely made her point.

When I put my wrist in front of her again, she gently cupped my arm with her little hands…

And the last thing I remember was growling ‘Mine’ when I felt the warmth of her lips on my wrist.

**

Translation: “Sweetie, what do you think you did while you and Gran were keeping each other company?”

“GO AWAY.”

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37 thoughts on “Chapter 7: Pussy

  1. I love you thank you for not making me wait for a translation. another fuckawesome. chappie. I think this may be my favorite yet. thank you

  2. The fact that Sam played along after all the taunting was impressive, even when it was what he wanted to do. I loved the crowds reaction.
    They’re going to end up in a taunt war with each other. Not just everyday pranks, but they’re moving to some line stepping. I think Sookie has been lonely by herself and now she has someone to play with.

  3. LOVED THE CHAPTER and Loved the fact u put in a translation at the bottom since i was reading on my phone again lol…. LOVE LOVE LOVE YOUR Work 🙂

  4. I love that Sookie manages to pull things over on him all the time. That, more than anything, should convince they’re right together.
    Jason needs to kiss Sookie’s ass from now until forever for what she’s done for him.

  5. Wonderful –and you know that there was more truth than a head-fake with that scene between Sam and Sookie –so much buried anger came out in that effort to bait Rene. Love the”vampire justice” that Eric bestowed on ol’ Rene –paralized for the rest of his life! Love the way your devious mind works –how will you cope when your children are old enough to pull that shit on you? You know it’s gonna happen …… 🙂
    Pat

  6. Awesome as usual 😉 They “got” Rene. About time. @$$hole! Sam can be a real prick but I like the way you portray him in all your vamp stories. I certainly don’t want him to end up with Sookie (on TV or in the books – although I’m terrified to see how CH is going to end the series *shudder*)
    Wonderful chapter. Keep up the good work. REALLY looking forward to the continuation of BTD but I’m happy to grovel for another chapter of this instead :-))

  7. Sam, you giant turd. I mean, in the books I like Sam well enough, but you manage to turn him into this giant asshole while still staying fairly true to character. Great chapter!

  8. I think it is brave for Sookie to make herself bait. “Jan”‘s mental fortitude is great since he is so protective of Sookie already. Sam played his part. He always has an unresonable adverse reacrion to Eric. I wonder why? Is there a back story?

  9. Awesome. I should have figured that Sookie would be on to Eric right away. I think she’s better at tricking him than he is her. Great plan to get Rene, but too bad Sookie had to be hurt to do it. I’m looking forward to Jason getting out of jail and coming home. I wonder how much recovery he will need.

  10. I didn’t make it half way before I started pouting that I was only going to be able to read this one chapter. I love how Eric and Sookie are together. I just love the story overall. Thank you for sharing this update with us. Thanks too for posting the bromance challenge. I think that one will be a lot of fun.

  11. Nice update! I love that Sookie turned the joke around on him again, and that they have admitted to wanting more with each other. Sam is an incredible jerk, and it was clear he meant all the things he was saying. I’m glad the townspeople stood up for Sookie after she left, and even glader she held her own with all the word play. I don’t know if they should really feed the Queen another telepath, since she has shown some bad judgement in other stories. It may make sense for Eric to just kill her like he threatened so he can keep Sookie.

  12. Loved it. I am no where near tired of Deaths Door. It is amazing how you come up with these similar yet complete different worlds. You must be tired with so much going on in your head. Having said that I would love to see more life and death or Alcide. I love that story line. Almost as much as BTD.

  13. I’m about a season behind on True Blood, not worried about it. I’m two books behind in the series, and could care less. I see a post from you.. no matter what day, or time, I drop everything I’m doing to read it… then fall into a depression that there isn’t more…. Thanks for sharing your talent!

  14. Fan-freaking-tastic! I loved that Sookie already knew Eric was joshing her with the cat and how she turned it around on him…I loved the “get Rene” plan and am so happy that Jason should be free soon…I loved watching Sam freak, even if it was supposed to be an act…and I loved the bit about the Corvettes! I wonder if he’ll actually get her a blue one; she’ll shit a brick, lol!

    I cannot wait to see what’s next for them:)

  15. Another constant in all the stories is the pranks. Glad to see that this Eric and Sookie are studying the journals (porn and all). Great chapter and I look forward to Jason getting out of prison… and hope he doesn’t have a temperamental attitude like Meanwhile Hadley.

    P.S. AIW?

  16. Please tell me we’ll have another chappie soon. I am really loving this story. I know you said it was suppose to be a short one, but damn I am loving the BTD off shoots. Awesome writing.

  17. Great Rene capture. He deserves so much worse than being trapped in his own body.

    I’ve always found it strange in fic that taking only her blood would let him feel her. If that was the case, he would be feeling fangbangers throughout the world for his entire life. Doesn’t make much sense.

    Is he going to get to off Bartlett too? How will they keep her safe from the Queen? I don’t see any way around her being found out since she’s “out” in the supe community.

    Let’s hope Sam learned to play nice but I don’t think that he was completely acting.

  18. paralizing renee AWSOME!!! love this eric and sookie!! great banter and cant wait till they bond it should be quite interesting 🙂 xoxo

  19. I just love your stories. I get excited every time there is a new chapter and you never disappoint me. Thank you so much!

  20. OMG! Incredible! Sam actually made himself useful! Lmao!

    Excellent chapter, as always. Sookie getting hurt actually made me realize that, unless I’m mistaken, the Sookie from Bored to Death was never injured in any way, which proves that the Viking’s protection is worth something. I’m ready to bet this is the last time this version of Eric let anyone lay a hand on Sookie.
    OK, I’m off to read the next chapter.

  21. sam was, as usual, his bigoted self. andy was still clueless. the only thing better would have been sam sitting in the yard licking his nuts as the emergency vehicles arrived.

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